I just wanted to make sure you looked good for your interview!
ANGRY CO-WORKER – JAN 2017
We all have that annoying team member who thinks they are it, don’t we? Well, I swear mine is the absolute worst, talk about up your own arse. He is the type of person who would push a kid out of the way to get attention at a party and who has a complete memory blank when you pull him up on a lie. I am sure you get me, so you will understand how epic it was to play a prank on him recently. He was up for a promotion, due to his incessant lies and sucking up, and was up alongside someday who deserved the job so much more. It may sound like I have sour grapes but he really is a bully and needed to be brought down a peg or two.
On the day of his interview, me and a few other members of my team arranged for a glitter bomb mail to be sent to the office and left at reception. The guy on reception is friendly with us, so I asked him if he could deliver the parcel to ‘dick for brains’ just before 10am, his interview time. Mr goody two shoes showed up looking all smart, with shiny shoes and a perfectly knotted tie, little did he know his shoes were going to get a whole lot more sparkly! Those ‘in the know’ conveniently made themselves busy near his desk, just before the parcel was about to arrive. He looked all made up for himself getting a hand delivered letter, “Probably and early congratulations card” he boasted. Oh, how wrong he was! Within 2 minutes his perfectly ironed suit was a big glittery mess, as was his nice new shoes, it was priceless. The whole office giggled and he just let out the biggest huff and puff I have ever heard, his face went as red as the glitter and I really thought he was going to burst in to tears. He stormed off, picking up his interview file, which spat out a load of glitter as he did so. I would have loved to have seen the interviewer’s face as the glitter certainly wasn’t all gone when he came back out. He stormed around the office for the rest of the day, blaming all of us but he never did find out who it was, he never got the job either, result! The only downside is that we all felt a bit sorry for the cleaner, so when he left work without tidying up properly, we spent ages trying to mop the mess up! Can’t wait to find my next victim.